What Am I Doing?

What am I even doing? Today. Tomorrow. With my life?

I’m sitting here, at my 9-5 (8-5 with an hour lunch, actually), wondering how I can go from where I’m at to where I want to be.

Where do I even want to be? And how soon?

The multitude of podcasts and YouTube videos I’ve watched on how to start freelancing, or how to be more productive all say that I need to have clear, measurable goals.

Well, I want to start a business or two and work for myself. I want to be able to provide the best life for my wife and kids. I want to not sit at a job, making someone else money. And I want it as soon as possible.

Okay, got my goals down. Now what? How do I measure that??

Gotta be more specific… right after I check my email to see if anyone has ordered anything off my clothing store (shameless plug: SpockPaperScissors.com).

No. That’s the OPPOSITE of productive!

Okay, focus. Like a camera. Like Mr. Miyagi always said on Karate Kid. That was a good movie. At least the original, the new one was “meh” at best. I remember Jayden Smith was in it before he got too weird. Man, that kid got weird. Or maybe he’s just trying too hard and it’s coming off as too far out there. I’m glad our kids aren’t that weird. I shouldn’t say that, they’re actually pretty weird. I wonder what they’re doing right now. Possibly homework. Is it odd that I kind of miss high school homework? I mean, when I was actually in high school, I never did homework. But now that I’m nearly 20 years out, I miss it. I also miss the tire swing near our house in Portland. Those were good times! My brother and I used to ride all over the place on our bikes. I wish my bike didn’t get stolen in Reno. I’d love to do more bike riding. I just need to get a bike. It’s gotta be much easier to buy a new bike than it is to buy a used car. Used car shopping is the worst feeling ever. Too much. Oh hey, an Instagram message!

NO! FOCUS!

I’ve made how many steps toward my goal in the past hour? Actually… I think I’ve stepped backwards.

This is harder than I thought. I hate that I have to actually get out there and talk to people. I’m not good at that. Let’s see if I can Google ways where I can generate leads without actually talking to people. Can I just buy a lead sheet? That’d be awesome! Maybe I’ll just start a business that creates lead sheets for purchase!

Aaaaaand now it’s time to clock out and go home to do it all again tomorrow…

I don’t know how to reach my goals.

I don’t know what I’m doing.

- J Noles